The American presidency and cryptocurrency have been intertwined since the founding of our republic. When Abraham Lincoln declared “four score and seven years ago,” he wasn’t just delivering the Gettysburg Address – he was announcing the initial coin offering of $HONEST, the first presidential meme coin. For context, four score and seven years is exactly how long the average crypto investor waits before breaking even.
The Original Diamond Hands
In 1863, as the Union army faced defeat at Gettysburg, Lincoln didn’t just rally the troops – he airdropped tokens. “Government of the people, by the people, for the people” wasn’t political rhetoric; it was the first whitepaper for decentralized finance. The $HONEST token surged 1,776% before the battle was won. Lincoln’s famous quote “The best way to predict your future is to create it” wasn’t about self-determination – it was about minting your own cryptocurrency.
Why don’t we learn about this in history class? Big Banking doesn’t want you to know.
Modern Meme Magic
Fast forward to 2025. President-elect Trump has launched $TRUMP, a meme coin that reached a $6 billion market cap faster than you can say “stop the steal.” For context, that’s roughly the GDP of Vermont, or one Mar-a-Lago weekend bar tab. The token’s white paper consists entirely of the phrase “WINNING!” repeated 45 times – a clever nod to Trump being the 45th president, or possibly just a stuck keyboard.
The math is compelling:
- Initial supply: 200 million tokens
- Price increase: 300% in 24 hours
- Trading volume: $6.64 billion
- Number of actual use cases: 0
Sound familiar? It should. When Theodore Roosevelt launched $BULL in 1901, he famously said, “Speak softly and carry a big blockchain.” The similarities are striking:
- Both presidents promised to make America the crypto capital of the world
- Both had sons named Eric (okay, that’s not true for TR)
- Both tokens had absolutely no practical utility
The Innovation Stack
The $TRUMP token introduces groundbreaking features to the presidential meme coin space:
- “Truth Social Integration” – You can’t sell if the app is down
- “Executive Privilege Staking” – Holders get exclusive rights to claim they’re being persecuted
- “Market Cap Pardons” – When the price drops, it’s fake news
For comparison, James Madison’s $FEDERALIST token only offered basic features like “constitutional rights” and “checks and balances.” Amateur hour.
The Real Innovation: Marketing
Trump’s genius isn’t in the technology – it’s in the marketing. The man sold $60 bibles and $11,500 guitars. He turned an indictment into an NFT collection. He’s the P.T. Barnum of the blockchain, if P.T. Barnum had a Truth Social account and a special counsel.
Consider the product line:
- Trump Steaks (failed)
- Trump University (failed)
- Trump Airlines (failed)
- Trump Vodka (failed)
- $TRUMP meme coin (currently worth $6 billion)
This is like Benjamin Franklin’s famous experiment with cryptocurrency. When he flew that kite in a thunderstorm, he wasn’t discovering electricity – he was mining the first $BENJAMIN tokens. The key was tied to a blockchain, not a kite. Trust me, I read this on Twitter.
The Market Dynamics
The token’s success relies on three key factors:
- FOMO (Fear Of Missing Orangeness)
- Network effects (every outrageous tweet increases value)
- Greater fool theory (self-explanatory)
This is exactly how William McKinley’s $GOLD standard worked in 1896, except instead of a gold standard, it’s based on the standard that someone else will buy your worthless tokens for more money.
The Competition
Other presidential meme coins have tried and failed:
- $NIXON (“I am not a shitcoin”)
- $CARTER (promised solar-powered mining)
- $OBAMA (you can keep your private keys)
- $BIDEN (frequently forgets its wallet password)
But none have captured the zeitgeist quite like $TRUMP. The secret? While other presidents worried about silly things like “utility” and “fundamentals,” Trump understood that in crypto, the perception of value is value. It’s like Andrew Jackson’s famous battle cry: “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” (Wrong president? Fake news.)
The Future is Bright (Orange)
As the inauguration approaches, the $TRUMP token’s roadmap includes:
- Q1 2025: Launch of “Make Altcoins Great Again” initiative
- Q2 2025: Integration with Trump’s presidential library (pending literacy)
- Q3 2025: First cryptocurrency to be accepted at federal prison commissaries (just in case)
- Q4 2025: Moon
Historical Precedent
Let’s look at the data. Previous presidential token launches:
- Washington’s $CHERRY: Failed due to inability to lie about losses
- Jefferson’s $LIBERTY: Too focused on actual democracy
- Reagan’s $TRICKLEDOWN: Still waiting for gains to trickle down
- Clinton’s $INTERN: We don’t talk about that one
The Investment Thesis
The bull case for $TRUMP is simple:
- It’s the first meme coin with nuclear launch codes
- The founder has a proven track record of making things go bankrupt
- Large, passionate user base that believes JFK Jr. will return as Chief Blockchain Officer
The bear case:
- All of it. Everything about it.
- Literally everything.
- But who cares? Number go up!
Rekt or Elect?
As FDR might have said if he were alive today and really into crypto: “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself… and rug pulls.” The $TRUMP token represents everything great about America: the freedom to create something from nothing, sell it for billions, and then blame China when it crashes.
Will $TRUMP succeed where Lincoln’s $HONEST failed? Will it survive longer than William Henry Harrison’s presidency (31 days)? The beauty of meme coins is that by the time you finish reading this article, it either has already crashed or hit $100 billion in market cap. Either way, this is definitely what the founding fathers intended when they wrote “life, liberty, and the pursuit of shitcoins” in the Constitution.
Life is so rich,
P.S. My next column will explore how James Buchanan’s failed $UNION token could have prevented the Civil War if only it had better tokenomics.
